Conversation While Opening the No Tell Books Checking Account

Bank Officer: Estimated yearly revenue?

Me: Oh, not that much.

BO: Under $20,000?

Me: You betcha.

BO: Will you need statements sent to anyone else other that you?

Me: Not unless I get an old man investor sweet on me and doesn't care that I blow through all of his money.


Any nutty old man investors sweet on me out there? Goofy old ladies? Emotionally challenged trust fund kids?

That's OK, keep your money.

No Tell Books is POD, fiscally conservative, all the books covers have images of big beautiful breasts!

No Tell Books is gonna break even!

And if not, the bank automatically approved the press for an $18,000 credit line even after I told them the business was unlikely to make much money publishing poetry and would only be able pay back loans in verse.

Yeah, it's the poet with her head up her ass. Hello bankers, do we know our roles? Mine is to make poetry books. I thought yours was to make money?


Addendum: I've discussed it with Chris. I'm going to use that $18,000 line of credit to buy a van and mattress (to save on hotel expenses for travelling poets -- get your mind of the gutter).

That's right boys and girls, the No Tell Poetry Van is coming to your town!

Dear Nutty Old Man Investor, please send gas money!