If you bitch about not getting a piece of the pie, there's always somebody quick to point out why you haven't earned your piece. And btw, your rage makes your ass HUGE enough, so it's probably best you don't have pie.

Then somebody else points out that you're not the only one who doesn't have a slice, so don't go talking about your pielessness until you address everyone else's pielessness.

So you decide to bake your own pie, yeah, it's a lot of work and messy, but it's something you're capable of doing -- and guess what, it's delicious and you get to decide who gets a piece. Sweet, crusty pie capital -- yours all yours!

But baking your own pie hurts other people's feelings -- that's not the answer to the problem, you're just divvying up a pie differently and you're not sharing with those who already have a slice of pie. No fair! They've always supported your right to pie! Now get back in line for that stale, congealed pie everybody else is arm wrestling over. You'll get a taste. Eventually.