Monday, May 14, 2007

Speaking of crappy corporate renaming -- here's Chris' patent application for a product that in the end was assigned the moniker "WAN defense mitigation service" by MCI/Verizon weenie higher-ups.

Doesn't make you want to read the patent application, does it?

They should have used one of inventors' suggestions. Way better.

Packet Protector
Packet Scrubber
DOS-B-GONE
MCIsion
Packet Polisher (my fav)
Big Red Button

and lastly . . .

Network Tampon "Halt the Flood" (Chris' favorite, he believes it's quite clever)

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5 Comments:

At 10:24 PM, Blogger greg said...

There are very good reasons not to use a fancy name in a patent. See, for instance, Kellogg Co. v. National Biscuit Co., 305 U.S. 111 at 117-18:
[T]he name 'Shredded Wheat', as well as the product, the process and the machinery employed in making it, has been dedicated to the public. The basic patent for the product and for the process of making it, and many other patents for special machinery to be used in making the article, issued to Perky. In those patents the term 'shredded' is repeatedly used as descriptive of the product. The basic patent expired October 15, 1912; the others soon after. Since during the life of the patents 'Shredded Wheat' was the general designation of the patented product, there passed to the public upon the expiration of the patent, not only the right to make the article as it was made during the patent period, but also the right to apply thereto the name by which it had become known.

That knowledge, as it happened, was not necessary for the final exam I took Thursday.

 
At 10:35 PM, Blogger Reb said...

Thanks lawyer boy -- I'll have Chris put in a good word for you with the suits at corporate headquarters.

 
At 12:15 AM, Blogger Christopher said...

Greg, the renaming/naming fiasco centered not around the patent(ing) but the product definition. I think the legal/marketting folks just searched for something 'not in use' and got stuck with 'wan defense'.

 
At 12:17 AM, Blogger Zinger said...

I also liked Real Time Filtering Mechanism, but "Port Authority" was my favorite. I believe the naming came from a Manager who had just gotten her CISSP and was excited about the "Defense in Depth" poster she had received. I believe LAN/MAN/SAN/and KLAN Defense may have been next on her agenda.

 
At 6:11 PM, Blogger Phatback said...

So now his unique nerd style is patented?

 

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