2009 Resolution

Stop repeating the same bone-headed mistakes. In general I’m a trusting person and for the most part, this is a good quality, but not without its pitfalls. Its pitfalls were too numerous and costly in 2008. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt. Sometimes I give this benefit to people who brazenly exploit it. I make up excuses on their behalf to explain away their obviously poor behavior. Too often I ignore my inner voice that tells me from the get-go to watch out, someone is trouble or lying or being manipulative or just plain nuts. I am not going to give up on humanity in an effort to protect myself, to stop repeating my bone-headed mistakes. Instead I’m going to lean more on my intuition and less on my thinking. My formal education heavily weighed on logos, which itself isn’t a bad thing, it’s just not my thing. I’m much more an intuit type. I’m going to try to unlearn some of my logic training and learn how to better embrace my own qualities. I’ll be stronger and more effective that way. Hopefully even happier. This doesn’t mean I’m going to become completely irrational and hang my shoes from my ears. It means I’m not going to let rational thought do as much of the leading. To be honest, I made this decision a little while ago and now in my dreams instead of punching and yelling at Chris all the time (in dreamland he’s stands for my logical aspect) we work together and lately he even gives helpful advice and completes useful tasks. In fact, just last week (in dreamland) he handled a mean boy from my high school at a reunion. Finally! The night before that, while walking through C. Dale’s home-crypt, Chris pointed out a shared tomb of a man and a woman, pondering their relationship. Something I hadn’t even considered. See, balance, baby. It all works in balance. I’m working towards that in 2009. Spiritually and shit.