Wednesday, December 31, 2008

As Gideon's mother, it's my responsibility to make his New Year's resolutions until he's old enough to do so himself.

His resolution for 2009: Stop getting into and busting shit.

Today he cut his face shaving. He found a disposable razor in a vanity drawer and I guess he wanted his skin to be smooth for all the kissing tonight. Yesterday he cut his hair (again) and applied my cream-based foundation over his snot-dried face. He wrote all over the dining room high board with a black sharpie. Stuck googly-eye stickers to the living room coffee table. Spilled macaroni cheese powder all over the kitchen counter. Smeared peanut butter all over the sink. That's just the last 48 hours. I don't have a box big enough to put him in anymore. He's figured out the combination lock on the dungeon. I don't know what else to do other than cease sleeping, going to the bathroom and showering.

Speaking of New Years, we're not leaving the house tonight. Long ago I came to the conclusion that only cheese-dicks go out on New Years. We're not cheese-dicks.

4 Comments:

At 5:54 PM, Blogger Collin Kelley said...

Reason 487 why I'll never have kids. I would have already pulled a Joan Crawford and tied my kid to the bed.

 
At 9:04 PM, Blogger RL said...

I believe parenthood qualifies me for sainthood.

 
At 10:16 PM, Blogger Pamela Johnson Parker said...

I believe that parenthood qualifies us for sainthood and drill sergeant status at any Marine base, anywhere.

Keep telling yourself, Girls are worse...

Happy New Year!

 
At 9:47 AM, Blogger Unknown said...

I don't know what to tell you- excpet watch out for the microwave.

We went through two before the experimenting stopped.

 

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