Competition is Brutal

So how is it that even though I sent Sam 264 e-mail messages in February I only managed to rank 7? God damn CMU nerds, get a life. You're making this too difficult.

For the live-in girlfriend who sent 430 messages: You LIVE with Sam. It's not even that big of a house. Why don't you guys just speak to each other? You know, move your lips, bring forth sounds from your mouth.

This is the problem with our civilization.