Sunday, October 05, 2008

I am a very powerful poet. I know people. I am connected. My sister, brother-in-law and sister-in-law are lawyers and my husband works for Google which basically means I can file lawsuits all day long and make anyone "virtually" disappear. Snap. Just like that. While it is well within my realm to obliterate certain editors who intentionally attributed a poem that I did not write to my sacred name, I have decided to show mercy to those punks who didn't know who the fuck they were dealing with, Reb Fucking Livingston, that's who!

I show mercy, cause I'm spiritual and shit.

This is the poem (sans the pretentious computer-generated indents) attributed to me:

Possessing air

Simpler than a callous
Smarter than an administration
More intelligent than a tin
An immense heart, indistinct heart,
unexplored heart of a stupid
There is no air more intimate
than water
Distant memory in typical bale, where
tins will go
Like a symbol
Like a power
There will be time
for the lank muddle
We will unearth
her muddle in armfuls of self-defence
We will have one agent, she will
have two
We will say her in
late autumn
Writing drollery from
It will be like hiding a

Here is the true, soul and flesh Reb Livingston poem:

Owning the Nightprayer

Garblier than a cowlick, heartier than governance, more vacant than tipwoe. An entombed hark, a pinked hark, and unprobed hark of a muted voyage. Snare is no more bootied than therapy. Vacant meltfrown in a tingling horsewail, where tipthroe will ghost. Ghostlike a double. Deathlike a gift. There will be a frame, for splayed bangle. We will birth her bangles as armlets of wonderdamsels. We wondered pregnant, she wondered seastunt. We partwayed astray. Ripewise from oppowit. It will be like chiding your double.


At 12:47 PM, Blogger Shann Palmer said...

I can't tell whether or not the whole thing is a fake, with not-so-cleverly written pieces by all sorts of folk-

it's a little lame IMO- with 3,000 pages, doncahthink?

or am I just not in on the joke?

At 5:46 PM, Blogger Reb said...

All the poems are written by a computer -- the full explanation was posted on the Harriet blog last night.

At 6:34 PM, Blogger Collin said...

It's almost...dare i say it...mavericky.

At 6:55 PM, Blogger Shann Palmer said...

I figured- I worked all day yesterday and am just now getting back to the computer to troll for news.

I'm just sad I didn't get one.


At 12:45 AM, Blogger Nicole said...

I think my poem is about menstruation. Which... makes sense to me.

At 1:31 AM, Blogger Martha Silano said...

I know you must've been super pissed to find someone using your name to write a really, really lame-ass computer-generated poem, but I must say your response to it is absolutely brilliant. Nothing like the real Reb is all I have to say.

At 8:39 AM, Blogger Reb said...

Eh, I wasn't that pissed. :)

At 9:17 AM, Blogger Jennifer Bartlett said...

That's surreal! Can you make Palin disappear?

At 9:19 AM, Blogger Reb said...

Give me 5 weeks. She's a very powerful Alaskan, it's going to take a little while.


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